A/N: Demy here! I kind of want to make this story for a few reasons. One, the only person's perspective we haven't used for a one shot is Kain (Wait, have we used Maes yet?). Two, I need to clarify his backstory, because he obviously lied about a lot of it to everyone else. I just think it's really awkward how I left it. And had him randomly give his backstory to some people he just met... Yeah, I didn't handle it well... So, hopefully this can make up for it.
This story, as I've said, is basically a better explanation of Kain's backstory, from his perspective. He's probably about... I want to say he'd be 11 years old at this time. I forgot what I said before. Maybe, maybe not. Oh, well.
I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist. At all. *sigh*
(KAIN)
The intensity of the sun in Ishval never got to me, but I supposed that came with being Ishvalan. To anyone else, though, Ishval would be absolutely terrible. To me, 70 degrees was freezing.
Lying in the warm sand, I grinned up at the sky. It was fun just to be a bit lazy sometimes, though I felt a little guilty for being sinful. I sat up and shook sand out of my ponytail, deciding I should get back home before noon. Judging by the position of the sun, I still had plenty of time to make it, and hopefully Mother wouldn't be too angry with me for being gone for a while. Even if I went out every day, she would always worry whenever I left. I found it a bit strange.
As I walked back towards the village, I kicked up sand, making little dust clouds. I stopped doing this as my sandals were filled with the gritty stuff, even if it was the most entertaining thing to do on the 20 minute walk back. It made me slightly question why I ever started leaving the village periodically. I supposed it was possibly because everyone always seemed so on edge there, and to leave was the only way to relax. But I didn't need to be leaving anyway. There was a lot of work to do around the village, and I did want to be of some help, so I hurried back quickly, humming an Ishvalan hymn as I walked.
"Kain!" I heard as I entered the outskirts of the small village. A little girl, Hosanna, ran up to me with tears in her red eyes, her white pigtails bouncing at her ears. "Kaaaiiinnn!" she screamed, jumping into my arms and gripping my shirt.
I looked down in surprise, sitting her on the ground and kneeling in front of her. I tucked a pigtail behind her ear and she rubbed her eyes. "Hey now..." I whispered soothingly. "What's wrong?" I tried to give her a reassuring smile.
Hosanna sniffed and looked up at me, tears still streaming down her face. "You... You left! I didn't know where you went!" she cried. "I couldn't find you!" She wrapped her little arms around me, tears soaking my shirt. Figures she missed me. Hosanna would cling to everyone in the village, especially me. Honestly, if I'd had any siblings, I'd have wanted it to be her.
I chuckled slightly, pulling her closer. "Shh... It's okay, I'm here." I had to laugh, though. She knew I left the village sometimes, she knew I always came back at the exact same time, the exact same place. She would sure get lonely quickly.
She pulled away from me and stood up straight, barely coming to my eye level, even on my knees. "Oh!" she exclaimed suddenly, seeming to have forgotten how distraught she'd been a few seconds ago. "Your momma said she needed you."
Erk. "Oh... Is that so?" I said nervously. No doubt she wanted to scold me for being gone. "Well... I suppose I will go see what exactly she needs me for... And you had better get home as well, Hosanna. Surely your mother is worried."
She traced circles in the sand with her foot. "Okay..." She looked back up at me, then ran off, shouting, "Bye, Kain!"
I chuckled and walked back home to our small clay house near the middle of the village, surrounded by houses just like it. As I stepped through the door, Mother stopped me from advancing, shoving the end of her broom in my chest, then resuming sweeping. I sighed and ran my hand through my hair. "Mother, if you're trying to get all of the sand out of the house, you're going to have a difficult time," I laughed.
She grinned, stopping and propping an elbow on the end of the broomstick. "Well, goodness. That would have been nice to know sooner," she gasped sarcastically, then rolled her eyes, giggling.
I grinned, gingerly taking a step inside the house, making sure I'd gotten most of the sand out of my shoes. "You said you needed me...?" I asked.
"As a matter of fact, yes," Mother said, gripping her broom. "I need you to tell me where you have been."
I shrugged. "Just in the desert. Why do you ask?"
"Don't question me."
I stopped, knowing when to hold my tongue. Sensing that the conversation was over, I exited the house. It was better not to be around Mother when she snapped at me.
I bumped into my father as I turned to exit the house. "Hello, Father," I greeted, giving a slight smile.
He looked down at me and grinned. "Hello, Kain," he said, ruffling my hair. I chuckled and looked up at him.
My expression changed to a more solemn one. "Father? Am I not allowed to leave the village? Mother said..."
His grin turned to a frown. "... No, you may not," he said.
"I mean no disrespect, but may I ask why?" I questioned. I didn't understand why they had to be so protective of me. Or why everyone in the village was so cautious about a lot of things, as if they were afraid of something. Something that no one would tell me. I didn't know if the reason was that I was too young, or what it could've been, but I knew that they all kept some secret.
Father sighed. "Kain... I've no reason to explain my decisions to you."
"If your decision involves me, I believe I ought to know." I knew I'd stepped over a boundary.
Father simply walked away, no other explanations or anything. I sighed, a bit angry that no one would just talk to me. I loved my parents, but the secretiveness was irritating.
Upset, I walked to the center of the village, where a small fountain stood, trickling water from the top and falling slowly down the tiers and collecting at the bottom. I sat on the edge and dipped my hand in the water, then wiped it across my face and soaked my hair, which helped me cool down a bit.
"No sitting on the fountain, Kain."
I whipped my head around and saw Michaela staring crimson daggers at me, her tan face framed by long snow-colored hair. She looked as menacing as usual, a sort of vicious aura seeming to emanate from her. She was probably in her early forties, though years of constant scowling made her seem much older.
I quickly hopped off the fountain and bowed my head slightly. "My apologies," I said sincerely.
She crossed her arms as she approached me, her usual venomous glare cutting through me. "You seem to never be able to follow instructions, isn't that right Kain?" she growled, then looked to her companion, Joshua. "So troublesome."
Joshua shrugged. "Michaela, I believe there are other things to worry about than Kain."
"Like what?" I asked curiously. Maybe he would tell me something.
"Nothing that concerns you," Michaela hissed. "You'd better thank Ishvala that I don't report what a troublemaker you are to the Elder." Oh, yeah. Now I remembered. These two were the Elder's watch dogs.
Joshua sighed. "Michaela, we should be on our way now." Despite her protest, she followed as he left. "Sorry to have bothered you, Kain." I liked Joshua a lot better than Michaela. For obvious reasons. I mean, all I did was sit on the fountain. It was hard to respect Michaela when she was so...let's just say difficult.
(One note here: Joshua and Michaela are two of the Ishvallans that we met when we were captured in Kain's village. Fun fact.)
I turned back towards home and started walking. I didn't want to stay here any longer, for fear of running into Michaela again.
When I got back to the house, I went straight to my room. My mom asked if I was hungry, but I just ignored her. Surely she knew I was angry with her unreasonable judgement. I knew I had no right to be questioning my parents, but it had gotten to the point where I was just irritated.
"Kain," my mom called. "Come here."
Great.
I stood and found my mother in another room of the house, sitting down in a chair. I sat down in a chair opposite hers, waiting to hear why she'd called me in here.
She sighed. "Kain... You seem upset."
"What was the first clue?" I asked.
She smiled sadly. "I'm sorry if I've angered you in any way, but I just want what is best for you."
"And not letting me leave the village is what's best for me? What do you suppose is going to happen? There's no one else out here for miles," I argued childishly.
Mother rubbed her tan hands on her skirt, tilting her head slightly to the side. Her long white hair almost touched the ground like that. "You'll understand when you're older."
Classic excuse for adults keeping secrets. But her mind was made up, and there was nothing I could do about it. If I would learn when I was older, at least I would learn it at some point. "Alright..." I mumbled.
Mother smiled, coming over and hugging me. "That's my little Kain," she crooned, kissing my cheek. I grinned a little, not quite as upset. Mother stood up straight. "Alright... There was something else I was supposed to tell you..." She snapped her fingers, a light seeming to come on in her head. "Ah! Hosanna told me to ask if you would want to play with her."
I chuckled. "Sounds like fun."
Mother winked. "Good." She walked out of the room as I stood from my chair.
"Geez, that little girl..." I said, though I really wasn't complaining. I had fun with her. "Always wanting to play..." I laughed as I walked out of the room in the same direction my mother had gone, towards the front door.
Before I knew what was happening, a loud boom resounded everywhere, the force of the vibrations knocking me off my feet. More sounds like it arose, along with shouting and screaming from outside. Completely confused, I regained my balance and ran to my mother, whom was standing frozen at the door, staring outside. I looked past her and saw a glimpse of what was happening. Fire engulfed almost everything in sight. People lay dead and bloodied everywhere. People whom I didn't recognize ran through the village, wielding weapons I'd never seen. I stared in horror at the image, running outside to just see if there was any possible thing I could do. But I didn't even know what was happening. I had no idea who these foreign people were, or why they were here, or why they would...
"Kain!" I heard my mother shriek as she ran up to me and grabbed me by my shoulders. She was shaking horribly, tears falling down her face. "Get inside! Get inside the house, now!!" I reluctantly followed her instructions, but stayed just in the door frame, though wanting to ran away, wanting to not see or hear any more of the madness. The terrifying shrieks of people dying... People I'd known my whole life... Their blood staining everything in sight... And these mad men, killing...as if it were...fun... The sick, twisted, grins on hear faces... The cackling laughter... Killing under a shroud of smoke.
I couldn't control myself as I ran outside, willing with all of my heart for this to not be happening. Ishvala!! Do you not hear your children?! Please...save us!! I shouted in my mind.
"Kain!"
I turned and saw my mother a few yards from me.
"Kain! Leave--" She fell to her knees, blood spewing from her mouth and staining her dress. A tall, pale man stood behind her, holding a bloodied knife. He ran off, apparently satisfied.
"Mother!!" I shrieked, my face soaked with tears and caked with soot from the fires. I ran as fast as my legs would allow, but my vision was blurred from the tears and smoke. As I ran, I tripped and tumbled to the ground, coughing a bit. I looked back to see what had tripped me up. I saw the pure white pigtails of the little, bloody body on the ground. That was enough to know.
I didn't have the strength to stand now. What was my chance of getting out alive anyway...? My throat became sore from the mixture of smoke and ash to the point I could barely breathe. If I stayed below the smoke and hid, I figured I could possibly stay alive just...a little bit longer. I rubbed my stinging eyes and crawled over to whatever I could find to conceal myself. There was a partially demolished house that would serve well for this purpose. I made my way over to it as quickly as possible, trying to block everything else out. But as I hid behind a wall, I couldn't help but to look out into my surroundings.
All I saw...was death. The only living people I saw were the attackers, cheering over their work. That is...until my father showed up.
I couldn't see much from where I sat but flashes of blue lightning emanating from the scene. I heard the screaming of the foreign men, and blood splattering the ground. I hadn't the slightest idea what was happening. I crawled out from my hiding spot and tried to stand to get a better view, though it made me dizzy.
My father... All he did was touch the attackers and they...they exploded in a flash of light. He repeated this multiple times on dozens of the men, all of them meeting the same horrific fate. I was in complete awe seeing what my father was capable of, though it seemed impossible, and frightening. All he did was touch them with his right hand and... I shuddered.
He grabbed another man, and with blue lightning, blood poured out of the him. Even if Father was winning, he was slowing down. But he kept going, with me silently cheering from the sidelines.
One of the attackers knocked Father's legs out from under him, causing him to fall to the ground. He was quick to recover, but not to guard the next attack. A man dug a knife into his back, slicing and stabbing madly. I screamed and shouted and pleaded, collapsing to my knees. The sand soaked up my tears, as well as the blood of all who'd fallen. There was nothing I could do... Just...watch... "No... No! This can't...! I-I-I...." I cried, shaking and breathing rapidly, just inhaling smoke. I coughed violently wishing for this torture to just be over. "Mother... Father... No... You can't be... No!" I weakly tried to stand back up, my knees shaking with every movement. "This can't be... No, no, no..." When at last I was finally on my feet, I made a shaky step forward.
"Now, now, little one," I heard a deep laugh behind me. My eyes widened as I realized it was another one of the murderers.
My body slowly allowed me to turn around and see the man behind me. Tall, pale, and grinning a sickening grin as he clutched his knife in his hand.
"Aren't you lucky?" he chuckled, twirling the blade with his fingers. He wrapped his fingers around the hilt of the knife and lowered the blade to face me.
I was paralyzed. "Well... No use for me to just let you run, is there?" The next thing I felt was the hilt of the knife slamming into the side of my head, then everything went black.
--
"Kain? Kain!"
My eyes slowly opened, but took a while to adjust to the dim light of the room. I felt a cold stone floor beneath me, and my body felt just about as stiff. I pushed myself up with my arms, though the process was slow, considering my feeling like lead. As soon as I was in an upright position, I slumped against the wall, trying to take in my surroundings through my long hair hanging in my face, which was too much of an effort to move. It had all come out of the ponytail I kept it in.
The only other thing I could see in the room was another boy on the opposite wall. Through my grogginess, I could tell he was Ishvallan, though I couldn't make out his face.
"Kain!"
I slightly recognized the voice. I knew him. It was... "Zechariah...?" I mumbled almost inaudibly.
He let out a sigh of relief. "I thought you were dead!" he whispered loudly to me.
"Where...are we...?"
"... I... I don't know..." he replied, looking much more upset. I noticed that he had cuts all over his face, blood soaking everything. What had they done to him? Why?
I was able to raise my head up slightly, getting a better view of the room, though there wasn't much to look at. Just a door and us.
I blinked. "...Why are we...here...? What...happened...?" It was a struggle to get words out.
Zechariah swallowed, then shifted his gaze to the floor. After a long pause, he broke the silence. "They're all dead...!" he cried, burying his face in his hands. "Everyone..."
My eyes burned, dripping tears. "Every...one...." I took deep breaths as everything came back to me. Everything I'd seen. All the people who I'd seen die. Mother... Father...
I clenched my fists. This couldn't actually be happening...right? They couldn't be dead... "No..." I sobbed.
Zechariah looked back at me, but didn't say anything. Nothing needed to be said, because we both felt the same way, because we both were in the same situation. Not knowing where we were, but knowing that everyone we'd ever known was dead.
The gunmetal gray door swung open, banging against the wall with forceful impact that made me flinch. My question as to where we were still wasn't answered as I caught a glimpse of the other side of the door. All that was there was a dark hallway.
A woman clothed in black stomped in the room, steel-toed leather boots making a steady beat on the floor until she stopped in the middle of the small room. Her face was slender with very sharp features, black eyes narrowed and black hair in a uniform ponytail, with a few strands of hair hanging in her face. She glanced between Zechariah and I, practically fuming, yet, at the same time, grinning.
"Alright..." she purred, pulling a knife out of her right boot, then spinning it expertly between her fingers. She took a deep breath, then leaned against the back wall, parallel to me. "I have a simple question for the both of you. Quite a few of my subordinates didn't come back from the last raid. Either you Ishvalans somehow got a lot more powerful, or my men have serious explaining to do..." She seemed to be talking to herself half of the time "But as far as I've been informed..." Her thin lips stretched to a smirk. "Scar seems to have put up a significant fight."
Why would she be concerned with my father? And why call him by his old nickname? But what I really wanted to know was what this had to do with us.
The fair-skinned woman crossed her arms, still spinning the knife in her right hand. "So, back to my question," she continued. "One of you is his son, right?"
Zechariah inadvertently glanced at me, then returned his gaze to her, knowing what she probably wanted. Surely she would want to kill the son of whomever took out a lot of people that worked for her.
She and I made eye contact, then I quickly broke it, my heart rate increasing at the thought of what she might do to me. She gave me a look that was meant to say, So it's you?
I nodded almost imperceptibly.
"Well then!" She punctuated her sentence with a quick flick of her right hand, sending the knife through Zechariah's skull. I stared in disbelief, not able to move or speak. The woman yanked the bloody knife out of his forehead, then stalked over to me and knelt down, tipping my chin up with her index finger. She giggled slightly as she ran her tongue across the flat edge of the blade, licking the blood. It nearly made me throw up. "It seems we'd better get to know each other. After all, we're going to be spending a lot of time together."
"... What...?" What did she have planned? What would she want with me?
She stood, now towering over my crumpled body. "My name is Felicity," she introduced, mockingly giving a slight bow.
I remained silent. The less I talked to her, the better. I didn't care if she killed me, or whatever. I really didn't. I would've been perfectly content to die right then.
"Come on, kid," she urged, sitting back down leisurely on the floor. "What's your name?"
I just hugged my knees to my chest and remained quiet.
"Look, kid. I'm not a patient person. Just tell me your name so we can get on with this."
I still said nothing.
Her eyes turned to slits and she stood, swinging her foot forcefully to the side of my head, knocking me over.
I stared at the floor with hollow eyes, wincing. "...Kain..." I managed, now with a throbbing headache.
Felicity smiled. "See? Simple as that."
I'd never met someone so insane in my life. And she was the one controlling everything that was happening...
She sat back down in her position on the floor.
I took a labored deep breath. "... You killed..."--a few more breaths--"...everyone..." I felt blood trickle down my face from where she'd kicked me.
She shrugged, indifferent. "More or less." She grinned, revealing her slightly sharp canine teeth. "Sort of a family business, you know? My dad was a key person in the Ishvalan Extermination. Ever hear of Solf J. Kimblee, the Crimson Lotus Alchemist?"
It took a moment for my groggy mind to place the name, but when I remembered, I froze with fear. The daughter of that psychopathic murderer had me in captivity... There was no telling what she was capable of, but there was no doubt I would never leave here unscathed. Or even leave.
She noted my frightened look and giggled. "So you do know... And I also assume you know what alchemy is."
My head twitched in a nod. I didn't entirely know how alchemy worked, but I had a vague idea of what it was, from things I'd heard my father say in passing. I'd never actually seen alchemy, though. It was forbidden in Ishval.
"Good," Felicity said.
This made me remember something she'd said earlier. "How do you...know my father...?" I mumbled.
"Ah," she said, grinning. "I've just heard of him. But you know what? That scar on his face?" She drew an X in the air with her index finger. "That would be my daddy's handiwork."
I honestly hadn't known that. To be honest, my father had never told me much about himself anyway. Nothing to do with before he met my mother.
"Yup," Felicity continued. "Scar really has quite the story to him. And such a skilled alchemist." He was an alchemist? Is that how he was fighting? "Such a shame his alchemy died with him." She shot her mocking smirk to me.
I glared with contempt, though on the inside I was completely broken. Alchemy... There wasn't any way my father was an alchemist... It was forbidden. There was no possible way...
"It's funny. He always talked about 'divine judgement from God', yet in the end, that murderer got his own judgement," she laughed. "Such a hypocrite."
With all of the strength I could gather, I sat up and gripped her wrist, infuriated. "My father isn't--...wasn't a murderer...! And as for what you say of him being an alchemist...I know that is a lie! There...is no way...my father would commit such a sin...! Something that...unforgivable!" I growled, fighting to get the knife from her hand, but it only resulted in me getting my hand cut badly. I recoiled and backed up against the wall instinctively.
"Au contraire," she giggled. "In fact, one of his hobbies was killing State Alchemists. With alchemy. Crazy guy, right? He even teamed up with the person that caused my father to die. Alphonse Elric, another alchemist." I didn't know if I'd heard the name Elric before, but I was really in no state to think.
"Elric..." I mumbled.
"Yep. In fact, if that whole fiasco involving Alphonse and my father hadn't happened, I wouldn't be here right now. I probably wouldn't be committing mass genocide, and you would still have parents," she laughed, then stopped. "Sucks, doesn't it." She shrugged. "But oh, well... It did happen, and we're right here right now. And the Elrics are living their happy little lives in Amestris..." she mumbled seemingly to herself.
The Elrics... So, in a roundabout way... This was all happening because of something they'd done...? If Alphonse Elric hadn't gotten involved with Kimblee, then...this wouldn't be happening? Mother, Father, Hosanna, Zechariah, everyone... I shook with anger and sadness.
"That rage in your eyes.... I like it," she chuckled darkly. "Go ahead, get angry, but you can't change things."
I glared up at her, wishing looks could kill. Again, I gathered my strength and made another grab for the knife, this time putting up more of a fight as I felt less drowsy and weak, as if anger was actually making me stronger. She seemed thoroughly thrilled to fight, but it was no chore for her to keep me at bay, holding out the knife at me. I knocked it out of her hand and pinned her shoulders to the ground, then grabbed her neck, gripping as tightly as I could. She grinned, though, and reached in her pocket, but I was too focused on the task at hand to notice.
Something stuck my arm with a painful pinch. I glanced down and saw Felicity's hand holding a hypodermic syringe in the crook of my elbow, injecting an unidentifiable liquid into my body. I hopped off of Felicity as quickly as possible, only to immediately get dizzy and fatigued. I felt numb all over and my vision got fuzzy, my eyelids drooping. I involuntarily dropped onto my side on the floor, and Felicity stood over me, hands on her hips.
"You passed the test...hmhmhm... Now things get fun," I barely heard her muffled voice say before falling unconscious.
--
The next thing my body registered was pain, going across my skin like fire. I still hadn't gained full consciousness, just enough to be aware of whatever I was feeling physically. Under the sedation, I was only able to locate the pain in my right arm, as if I were being cut with knives. I didn't know what was happening. All I heard were vague voices behind the sound of my constant shouting in agony, and everything was too dark and blurry to see. I was unable to move, frozen in place by whatever substance Felicity had injected in my arm.
I didn't know how long this went on, as time lost all meaning in the blur of pain, but as soon as whatever it was has ceased, I felt instantly relieved, though my arm still stung almost as intensely as the initial feeling. I moaned and forced my eyes open, slowly adjusting to the light. The room was brighter than before, but that was because it was a different room. This one was painted white, with fluorescent lights hanging from the ceiling. As I tried to sit up I immediately had to lay back down from dizziness. I felt like lead, heavy and completely numb, save for the stinging in my arm, which was dangling off the table I was lying on.
As my eyes adjusted, I saw two black clad, masked men standing stationary at either side of the door on the opposite end of the bright room. Felicity stood off to the side of the room, casually running the flat part of her bloody knife against her tongue again, making me cringe. She grinned as I saw her, putting her tongue back in her mouth, then placing the knife next to me on the table, not even entertaining the notion that I could use it to kill her. She was right, in that respect.
"Man, you scream a lot," she chuckled. "And so loud... Quick question: do you always yell for mommy when you get hurt?" She doubled over in laughter, then came closer to me as she composed herself, sitting in a chair beside me, crossing her legs. Her pitch black eyes glanced over me. "Turned out nicely, I'd say," she commented.
A slight look of confusion contorted my face. "... What...?" I mumbled.
"You know what a transmutation circle is, right?" she asked.
"No..." I answered groggily.
"The array that makes alchemy possible." I frowned at the mention of the forbidden art again. "You've seen one before. Trust me."
"... No... I haven't..."
"Stupid kid..." she murmured, then grabbed my right wrist. She lifted my arm to my line of vision, revealing what she'd apparently been doing during my sedation. A familiar patten was carved into my arm, and in the gashes was black ink, pigmenting my skin. Blood mixed with ink dripped from the cuts.
I blinked, confused. "... This is..."
"You saw what your daddy could do, right? How he could just make people completely blow up. It was alchemy, no doubt, but the secret to that is the transmutation circle, which he had tattooed on his right arm," she explained. "This,"--she traced lines in my arm--"is that same pattern."
I stared at my arm with wide eyes. This sinful pattern was now permanently on my skin. "Why would you...?" My breathing quickened. This design which I'd seen my whole life turned out to be related to something that brought the downfall of my country once. And the fact that my father had been an alchemist... I... I hate him.
"Let's just say that this is an experiment," she purred. "You carry Scar's blood. You must have some alchemical abilities, at least."
"But why did...?"
"Look, I'll be straightforward. We're both the same." I glared. I was nothing like her. "We both want revenge. And the fact that our revenge falls in the same place... Let's just say that this is to the benefit of you as well."
"Benefit...? Forcing this...sinful mark on me... It's not to my benefit," I breathed. I felt some of my muscles begin to work. I decided to wait for more of my strength to come back before I did anything too drastic.
"I hate the Elrics, you hate the Elrics. And now, you have the proper way to get your revenge," she tempted, poking my arm and making me wince.
"I'm not...going to use alchemy," I snapped. "And I'm not doing your work for you." I was starting to feel a little bit less drowsy as the time went on.
Felicity rolled her eyes and groaned. "Come on, kid," she urged. "Just get off your high horse and do it. Don't act like you're so high and mighty just because you have your 'Ishvalla' on your side." It was all I could do to restrain myself, even in my current state. "But think of it this way: where was Ishvalla when everyone in your village was slaughtered? If Ishvalla actually existed, wouldn't your friends and family would still be alive, and you wouldn't be in this little predicament?" She gave a dismissive wave of her hand and leaned over me, then turned around, walking nearer to the door. "Whatever... All Ishvallans are so blind they'll believe anything..." she mumbled, making me snap. Using every ounce of strength I could conjure up, I stood and lunged towards Felicity, reaching for her. She seemed to sense this and moved to the side, sending me running into one of the masked men at the door. As I tried to catch myself before I fell, I pushed against him with my hands, not realizing what would happen. Just as my right hand made contact with his chest, a flash of blue lightning signaled the end of his life, blood staining his clothing.
I stepped backwards and my knees became weak as the body fell to the floor. I'd just...killed someone... My breathing became ragged as I shook like a leaf.
Felicity cheered with excitement. "Alright!" she crowed. "So it does work! This is fantastic!"
I turned to her with wide eyes. "Fantastic?!" I shouted in shock, staring at my right hand, now covered in blood.
"Quite," she giggled, slinking up to me. "Now I know that you have the ability."
"I will not do your dirty work for you," I repeated.
"But there's something in it for you..." she sang.
"No! I don't... I don't want revenge!" I yelled. It wasn't a total lie. Though I did want revenge, it wasn't on the Elrics. It was Felicity directly.
"Not that," she said. "All I'm saying is, well... There are many things you can do with alchemy..." She leaned against the wall casually. "... Resurrection is one of them."
Our eyes met, and I knew she wasn't lying. I knew alchemy was capable of evil things, and this was total sacrilege. But what exactly was she saying?
"You do as I say," she crooned, "and you'll have your parents back."
I froze. "Is that possible...?"
"Of course."
What if she was lying? What if I did as she said and it all turned out to be a lie? What if it wasn't a lie? What if it actually worked?
I stared at the ground, avoiding Felicity's mocking grin. "...Alright," I said after a long pause.
In this whirlpool of sin, what would one more thing do to me? I had nothing to lose, forsaken by Ishvalla. Now I knew that there was no way to return to how things were before, and if I had to change myself completely, it didn't matter. Nothing really mattered. The only spark of hope that would urge me forward was the possibility of Felicity coming through on her promise, and the fact that I knew I would come back here after it all was over. I would come back and kill her, and I would enjoy every second of it.
I went and sat down on the table, secretly sliding Felicity's knife in my pocket.
"Perfect," Felicity chuckled, not noticing. She looked down at the dead body on the floor. I didn't care about it anymore. If they were going to help this mad woman, they deserved to die. And I didn't care if I was the killer. "This is going to be brilliant!" She turned back to me and clasped her hands together. "Alrighty, Kain. Here's the full deal. You bring me the Elrics, you get your parents back. Deal?" She held her hand out to me.
I grimaced and reached for it. "Yes." We shook hands, the movement in my right arm making it sting. I supposed I could've killed her right then. I had the alchemy, but still I wasn't sure how to use it. And I still needed her. I would kill her after I got my parents. "Teach me how to use alchemy."
"It's easy. For you, just kinda get mad and touch someone with your right hand. I'm pretty sure that will be all it takes. The rest'll come naturally. The more you use it, the more you'll be able to control it."
I looked down at my right hand, then clenched it into a fist. "So now what?" I wondered aloud.
Felicity crossed her arms. "Go to Amestris. Find the Elrics. When you do, well...you know where I am," she instructed. But I still didn't know exactly where we were.
I nodded curtly.
She turned to the man guarding the door, standing beside the dead one. "He may need help finding his way out," she told him, jerking her thumb towards to door. "This place is a freaking maze..." she mumbled.
The guard nodded and looked at me, waiting for me to follow. I stood up and walked to the door, which he'd opened. Felicity watched us exit, waving. "Bye, bye, Kain."
I glanced back at her as the guard closed the door behind us. I followed him down the long, dark hallway, making turns every now and then.
The long walk gave me plenty of time to think about what I was actually getting myself into, but all of my thinking amounted to one thought: It's fine with me.
We stepped outside, then the guard left me alone. Though it was dark, I realized that I was still in Ishval. Someplace in the middle of the desert. Did Mother know about this place? Was that why she didn't want me wandering off?
What was I to do now? I didn't know where to even begin... Finding the Elrics would be one thing, but even getting to Amestris in the first place was going to be a problem. All I knew was that it was to the west, across the desert, and there was currently no sun in the sky to tell me where that was. So I set out in a random direction, which could've been west. I walked that way for what seemed like an hour before I saw anything in the barren desert. As I got closer to whatever it was that I saw, I could make out jagged lines in the contour of the landscape, which later became buildings as I got closer. Destroyed buildings. Buildings that seemed slightly familiar when I approached them.
This is...my village...
Seeing everything in such a state was devastating, all of the buildings reduced to rubble.
I slowly walked through the streets, taking it all in. Discarded weapons were strewn about on the ground, and almost everything in sight was charred from the fires. There were some bodies that sat smoldering on the ground, faces now unrecognizable. Some bodies were simply sliced apart, blood pouring out of every gash. I stopped and crouched next to a familiar body, running my fingers over her pigtails, dyed red from blood, and caked with ash. A horizontal red gash appeared prominently in her neck, and a criss-crossed pattern was carved into her stomach, staining her little white dress. Her crimson eyes were locked in a look of fear forever. I gingerly closed her eyelids and stood, wanting to leave before I had a chance to cry. "I'm sorry, Hosanna..." I whispered as I walked away.
My mother's body wasn't far away. She was still beautiful, despite such a gruesome death. She'd always been such a kind person. She didn't deserve this. I dropped to my knees and bowed my head. "This is my fault, Mother... You told me to stay inside and I didn't obey you... It's my fault you were killed... I--" I shook my head, exhaling and inhaling deeply. "Forgive me..." I brushed some hair out of her face to get a better last look, then stood and turned to leave. I started walking to exit the village when I caught myself glancing over to where I knew my father had died. I didn't know what drew me to walk over there, but once I was standing beside his body, I regretted it.
Seeing the deep gashes in his back, I rolled him over so I could see his face. I crouched next to him, pushing his right sleeve up and revealing his tattoo. I hadn't seen it many times, considering he usually made a point to wear long sleeved shirts, but now when I looked at it, it was so much different. I glanced down at my arm, which now had an identical tattoo as his wrapping around it, though my arm was a bit swollen from Felicity's tattooing method. It also stung horribly. And I'd killed someone with it. And there was no telling how many people Father had killed. With this alchemy... The forbidden art, a terrible sin... And it was now permanent on my skin. My breathing grew ragged as I stared at my father's body.
"I...hate...you," I huffed. I dug my fingernails into my arm, wishing there was some way to remove this mark. I shook with tears, uncontrollable tremors wracking my body. "I hate you!" I screamed raggedly. I collapsed on top of him, my head on his chest, gripping his shirt tightly. My chest rose and fell rapidly and I soaked his shirt with tears, wrapping my arms around him tightly. "I..." I mumbled as I sat up. I grabbed Felicity's knife out of my pocket and gripped it tightly with both hands. This knife would be my liberation. My shaky hands moved the knife slowly towards my chest, over my heart. I swallowed and took a deep breath, my knuckles turning white. Then my muscles relaxed, lowering the knife. I couldn't do it. All it would accomplish was pain endured for nothing.
"Father... I promise..."
If what Felicity had said was true... Can people actually come back? And alchemy... If it was so evil, was it...acceptable to do so with it? And why did I care if it was evil? Why did I care if I'd killed someone with it? How many of us did they kill? Hundreds? Thousands? Yes, I now knew that I wasn't the evil one in this scenario. But using alchemy didn't mean turning my back on God, did it? Surely not... But...
I clutched the knife again with one hand, my other hand grabbing my hair in a bunch. With one motion, I pulled the knife through it and let the white locks fall to the ground. I shoved the knife back in my pocket.
I took a deep breath as I looked back down at my Father. "I promise. I will get you back," I whispered.
A/N: Alright. Loose ends have been tied. It may not be what you wanted or thought or whatever, but...yeah.
And yes. You can make a tattoo by putting ink in a cut. It's a fact.
And for those of you that don't get why he cut his hair, it's symbolic, though it could've been portrayed better.
Anyway, thanks for reading and a big thanks to soul alchemist 15 for sticking with us! Love you, girl!
And read her Soul Eater story! It's amazing!
